Fall Down Go Boom

Today I had to visit the physiotherapist's office, to take care of my 90-year-old hip. She's a very nice young woman named Stephanie and it's kind of fun to go there in a sciencey way, but it's about a 15 minute walk from work, and today it was pouring rain. Like pouring.

As I am a genius, I decided this morning that instead of getting my nice leather sandals all wet, I would wear my rubber flip-flops and bring the sandals along. Well there was commotion before we left the house; the cat insisted on going out and then just sat under the picnic table, and we had to get her back in because 12 hours under a picnic table is no fun for anyone. I had to remember my brother's birthday present, and put it in a bag because of the rain. I had to find a raincoat. Hubby went out the wrong door to bring out the compost so I had to bring both coffees and lock up. So long story long, I forgot my nice sandals completely and I've been stuck in my yucky, stinky, flattened, paint-spattered flip-flops all day and I'm bitter about it.

Flip-flops are terrible in the rain. Your feet slide all around in them, side to side, and it's difficult to walk with any dignity. All they do is offer a layer of protection from the dirty pavement. They're especially no fun in the lobby of my building on a rainy day, as the floors are a polished marble, and soaking wet. That near-disaster should have been my first warning.

Anyway, again long story very long, I was walking to the physiotherapist's office at lunch, hating every minute of it, bracing my umbrella against the wind and pelting rain, when I slipped IN MY SHOES and fell down right in the middle of the street. As I was crossing. A rather handsome stranger rushed up and said "are you alright?" and I was like "oh yeah, fine, thanks" feeling like a complete idiot. I got up, brushed the bits of crud off of my soaking wet jeans, and pretended to carry on as though I was just fine, even though my bare toes had been crunched against the pavement and I believed that I could have been bleeding from one or both of my knees. Thanks to my red toenail polish I thought perhaps I was bleeding, but turns out I just put the polish on in the bumpy car this morning and it was all over my toes. Ha ha everything's fine folks!

It was an interesting fall. Falling is interesting, period. It's like it happened in slow motion. If you could read my interior monologue, it would have sounded something like this:

"oh dear, I'm falling.

Shit, what now?

Oh man, I'm STILL falling!

I can't believe it!

Oops, ok, tried to break my fall. That didn't work.

OK I am apparently still falling.

Oh, ok, watch the umbrella. Don't let go. Don't break it.

Oh no my bag's getting wet!

Wow ok I'm on the pavement. Guess it's time to get up again."

Does my mind work faster than most? Slower? It seemed like I was falling for about 10 minutes. OK not really. I got to physio and took off my pants and my left knee was skinned, but not bleeding. I proceeded to get a bit of acupuncture, but since it was my first time I moved, and my leg muscles went all weird and it felt like I had the jimmy legs. When I walked out of there, I felt like I was dragging it behind me kind of. I was afraid I'd fall down again.

I got back to the office, soaking wet and freezing, and then proceeded to slap peanut-sauce-covered noodles all over my face. (sigh). TGIF. Shit did I ever wash my face?